Pivotal Life Lessons from My Father: Words That Shaped My Character

What Was the Best Advice You Got from Your Father?

As I reflect on my life, one of the most influential figures has undoubtedly been my father. His advice, often profound but delivered with a simplicity that belied its depth, has played a pivotal role in shaping the person I am today. These lessons span from the mundane to the life-altering, each leaving an indelible mark on my character.

Always Treat Others with Respect

The most fundamental advice I received from my father was to always treat others with respect. This has been a guiding principle in my interactions with people throughout my life, enabling me to build strong and meaningful relationships. As a child, it was easy to see this as a mere social etiquette, but with time, I have come to understand that respect is the foundation of trust and understanding.

Work to Escape Unchangeable Circumstances

In the spring of 2003, my father gave me an advice that resonated deeply. On a cold, rainy morning, he told me, "Get to work, and let God handle the situation with your kids living with their mother/ex-wife." These words were cathartic and liberating. The realization that I could not change every aspect of life was a significant turning point in my thinking. This advice pointed to the importance of focusing on what I could control, which was my own actions and efforts at work.

Become Brave and Resilient

My father, a former Navy hard ass, taught me to be brave and resilient. He instilled in me a sense of toughness that was invaluable. He was also a professional gambler who taught me about statistics and odds, which were both entertaining and practical. His advice to be tough was particularly beneficial as I grew into adulthood. He taught me, using personal examples, that taking responsibility for my actions and not being easily discouraged were crucial in navigating life's challenges.

Your Character Defines You

above all, my father taught me that my character defines me. He emphasized the importance of honesty, kindness, and values in my life. He often said, 'Your character defines you.' This perspective has helped me make ethical decisions and live my life with integrity. Honesty and kindness are not only moral virtues but also essential for building a positive reputation and maintaining strong relationships.

Financial Wisdom: Use Cash Over Credit Cards

Apart from advice on life's big lessons, my father also provided practical financial wisdom. He taught me the importance of using cash money over credit cards. His reasoning was straightforward: cash purchases reflect the money you have, whereas credit card spending often leads to overspending. He highlighted that if you spend 100 dollars on a credit card, you end up paying 125 to pay it off in the long run. This lesson has stayed with me, and I apply it to this day, carefully managing my finances and avoiding unnecessary debt.

A Turning Point at the Bank

One of the most memorable moments when my father's advice truly crystallized for me came when I was about 19 or 20 years old. My father asked me to go to the bank to deposit some money. For someone who had always relied on my parents for even the smallest tasks, this was a terrifying prospect. I was overwhelmed with anxiety, feeling rejected and isolated. However, my father handled the situation gently. He explained that doing things on my own was crucial for growing up and understanding the value of time. He shared his youthful mistakes and how they had cost him dearly, teaching me the importance of doing my own work and the value of time.

This lesson may have been difficult to learn at the time, but its impact is still evident in my life. It has equipped me with the resilience to face challenges head-on and the wisdom to value time and effort.

My father's guidance has been a constant source of strength and inspiration. Though he is no longer with us, his words continue to guide my decisions and shape my character. These life lessons, often simple and sometimes surprising, have been the cornerstone of my personal growth and resilience. I am forever grateful for the wisdom he imparted and the person he helped me become.